Every business setting includes conversations.  But sometimes having a non-business-y context for those business-y conversations works wonders.

Several years ago, I took on a key role in a turnaround effort.  The business was in a downward spiral, but there was still time to turn the plane around, so to speak, and get it soaring again.  One of our key messages to the existing staff was, “We want you with us.”  And we figured, “Hey, it’s a business setting.  We’re discussing the business.  Conference room.”  And while we got a lot of head nods, we didn’t see much in terms of results. 

Then one day, I started inviting people to lunch.  I took them to a hole-in-the-wall Chinese joint, the kind with those Chinese Zodiac paper placemats.  While there, I began to talk about our vision for the organization.  I talked about how I saw their individual experience and expertise fitting into that vision.  I even turned those paper placemats into mini white boards, sketching out diagrams left and right of how I saw us winning and delivering new work.  And while it didn’t resonate with everyone, those lunch conversations are legendary in that office.  Several people still have one (or more) of those placemats at their desk. 

The context of a Chinese restaurant impacted them in a way a conference room never could.  Was it perfect?  No.  Was it something different?  Yep.  And it worked.  For them, and for me.

And since then, I’ve carried this thought with me. 

When it feels like I’m struggling to communicate with someone, like they’re just not getting it, what have I not done (yet) to connect with them? 

Have I been funny?  Firm?  A bitch? 

Have I tried speaking?  Writing? 

Singing and dancing? 

Scheduled meetings?  Taken them to lunch? 

Done impromptu Karaoke in the bathroom?

Because if they’re open to receiving, then I can communicate in a meaningful way.